Going back to the 20th century, dating had a completely opposite definition from what we consider it to be today. The word dating indicated two individuals going to an organized date together. Unfortunately, today we hear a lot about “hanging out,” and dating means seeing the other person exclusively. In fact, Northern Europe doesn’t accept the idea of planning dates, in any age. From that point, many don’t consider going on official dates a necessity. So, what is a date and why is it so important if we have our loved ones around all the time?
A date has three main parts to it: paired off, planned, and paid for. Going on a date can be compared to the three P’s for the man’s responsibilities stated in the Proclamation to the World: Family by the Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ. To start with, I will explain the concept of being paired off. Especially in high school, a lot of youth go on group dates. They have different activities such as movies, bowling, playing outdoor games, etc. If the group is paired off, everyone has someone to look out for. In any activity, they will check if their date is comfortable, if they feel safe; they will look out for their needs. As we get older and go on one-on-one dates – we, sometimes even unintentionally, look out for the other person because we are aware of the event being a date. That leads to the first “P” in the Proclamation. The man is the protector. He sets boundaries and knows the limits.
Second, the dates are planned. Whenever two or more people come to hang out – they think of what to do on the spot; or they simply don’t do much. Planned dates have many advantages. Either it is a man or a woman that is planning a date, it’s obvious that it shows how thoughtful they are. It indicates if they remember or consider the other’s interests. Finally, they show how much they care. Planning in the Proclamation can be compared to presiding. One of the students in my class said that the head of the family can’t successfully preside if they don’t plan ahead. When we are dating before marriage, we see how developed that skill is.
Third, considering the fact that planning is an important factor, the date is paid for. This point doesn’t necessarily have to teach who is supposed to pay for the date. Some say whoever is asking on a date is responsible for that. Others believe in splitting a bill. Another option is for the man to be courteous and offer to pay every time. Although dates can be simple, most of them tend to require payments. Either it is going to see a play or a concert, getting a dinner and/or dessert, etc. – a few dollars get spent. The concluding “P” in the Proclamation is the provider. Therefore, many girls and women accept to be paid for because they want to see if their possible future spouse can provide for themselves.
Dating has a very good impact on any relationship. It brings out unity, especially when the couple works on a common project or activity. People can talk and learn more about each other. Communication is one of the most important skills to have in a relationship. During dates we figure out the best way to approach different topics with that person. For not married people, dating is the best time to do it. Finding the time and picking activities that encourage communication makes it less scary for young people to discover if the other person is “the one.”
Even for married couples, when they already found their eternal companion, going on dates is very beneficial. Some may say “But I know everything about my spouse!” Each person goes through different changes and matures throughout their lives. Their thoughts and feelings change depending on the situation. Therefore, it is never late to ask questions. Commit, put in effort, ask, try your best and enjoy the blessings of dedication towards someone that you value.
Komentarze